Consumerism

Colleen N I on our way back from Blanca

Colleen N I on our way back from Blanca

Before you really read this section, open Spotify and bump, “Kung Fu Fighting”.

Spish Splash Ocean bath

Spish Splash Ocean bath

I work at Arc’teryx and Salomon in Tulalip, It’s the best Job because of the Co-workers. 70% of our clientele is Chinese, which is tight-ish. We can’t really communicate with them super well and our cultures are vastly different but for the most part it’s a good time. The other day a family came through and I welcomed them with a “What’s good, Welcome in” the grandpa stayed back while the family shopped around. He and I talked in broken English/Mandarin for a second. He stopped for second longer and pointed at everyone saying, “consume” with one big happy eye to eye grin.

Just a casual glance out the window in the north cascades.

Just a casual glance out the window in the north cascades.

Then he pointed at me and said, “Change” with an even wider smile. It took me a minute to register what he was conveying and then I threw an upbeat, “Shi” (Yes) back. He just smiled, the family left and I went back to zoning but I still think about it. Consume: to use up. The path we are on. Change: to make or become different. What we need. You.

Shimmied a tree for this B. Griff on the wheels

Shimmied a tree for this B. Griff on the wheels

As an outdoor photographer I struggle with this, we’re playing into the death of our resources with every little move and I’m just another part of that. Everything is wrapped in plastic, you always need pics of new gear, you gotta travel far for it, you need buyers to sponsor riders. And we’ve come far, skis aren’t just 2x4’s and bikes are so nuts with all their little geometry bits. Good stuff is worth it for sure. But how do we take care of this place? By only using it? By donating 10% of our earnings on earth day to some non profit? By flying across it to take photos of some jacket on a glacier that’s melting?

La Push

La Push

Don’t get too bummed on people who travel, you should go out there, experience this place. I’m not mad if you ride Moto, I used to love that shit. Buy a jacket if you need it. But if you don’t, don’t. Only recently we’ve had access to anything we could ever want within seconds. And we go, “damn I’d look fresh in that” or, “If only I could get that then my bike would ride so smooth just like Justin Barcia”. We will consume until there is nothing left, I only know this because it’s what I do. We just want more and we want it better than the last. It’s part of out need for progress. I look at Delica’s daily at work and dream of the next lens. It’s wild

Max Stritzel with his legendary plant

Max Stritzel with his legendary plant

I’m not inherently solving global issues or convincing you to not buy that thing but man, an old dude learned how to say two unique English words just to change the world. So what are you going to do with this info if you are on board with it? Purchase that next jacket? Plant something? Pretend? It’s easy to freak out or disregard new thoughts. Let go, and you’ll figure it out. You’ll realize what’s really important :) Some guy resembling a wise & ancient Chinese turtle told me.

But it’s rrrrly cute -Big R

Loose ends

On the Savannah with Colleen

On the Savannah with Colleen

"There's this Idea that in portraiture, it's the photographers job to set the subject at ease. I don't believe that." -Anne Leibovitz. This quote is one of my all time favorites because essentially what she is saying is, it's ok not to connect with everyone, it's ok to let the subject be, it's ok to be yourself. In this interview she goes on to tell a short story of Robert Penn Warren dying from cancer. She asks him to take his shirt off, showing the transparency of human nature. All that he is and in it's own way, it's beautiful. 

Rip g

Rip g

One of the most important things you can do on this planet is connect with another individual. Your connection to the subject is what makes an image worth so much and in any form there is a relationship; Nature, Wildlife, Action, Name one. On a photoshoot this is easy, just act like you're interested (thankfully 98% of the time I am). But that's temporary, in real life it can be difficult. Sometimes I'm not interested, or I can't think of anything to say, or.. they're not interested. So I'm going back to Anne on this one, It's not always my fault. Rather than pinning every relationship issue on myself, I stop and take things in for a minute. And what I find after letting go, is that the relationships I have, pass up anything you could assemble in a movie. From great friends, to bosses, to mega cuties, these wild connections are there. 

Wow yeah that's dumb

Wow yeah that's dumb

If God could just say, "Yo you'll be with this person in 5 years, just chill" that would be sick. But you know me, I like running after wet lemon shoes when the tide comes in. My two recurring life lessons, go slow and let go, are definitely present in the world of dating. Life lesson in dating though: Don't pump the brakes more, just give it less gas. I know I'll be able to play stupid love songs for that amazing girl one day. 

A moment in time I will remember until I die

A moment in time I will remember until I die

It's ok to not nail it all the time, sometimes you leave things with loose ends. You have no idea what happened but its ok, if it's meant to be it'll happen. And some photoshoots are goofy for a second, you are getting to know someone, it's ok to have a slow connection. 

Somehow Colleen and I were frozen in July, one of my favorite portraits.

Somehow Colleen and I were frozen in July, one of my favorite portraits.

A photo isn't made in the camera, but on either side of it. 

"Slam the truth on people" -Big Dog

Disbelief

Parallel parked my new boat with Kaitlynn

Parallel parked my new boat with Kaitlynn

It's been almost 5 years since I've started photography and I still find it just as much fun as when I started. I love showing the world the way I see it, and in turn seeing how others do. However even after all these years of letting go and loving it I still struggle with believing in my abilities. We all do though so it's not like anything new but at some point I just want to not think about it. Comparing myself to others and wondering why I'm not further along. I have no idea if that void will ever be filled and I think that's part of what drives me.

I asked these birds to fly through real quick

I asked these birds to fly through real quick

On the ferry back from the NW Cup I wiped the drying mud from my camera to really see the photos. I realized something. Abilities and flaws go hand in hand to make something wonderful.

one of the coolest man made corners on earth

one of the coolest man made corners on earth

I somehow got an old canon 5d ii in time to shoot the race and it was mad fun. I didn't use Auto focus and and the slow frame rate really made timing crucial. 

I mess w ivy

I mess w ivy

Brian w the gap

Brian w the gap

You know it's a good mountain bike shoot if you almost get hit and need to be pressure washed after. There is a corner right next to me in this spot and in that corner is a puddle everyone rides through. In this moment I have no doubt in any ability to get a photo. I'm caked in mud and the content is fire. But once the mud is all gone, enough thought convinces me I'm not good at it. Or rather that I'll never be good enough. I'll just be a lil stick in the mud.

Magnus the

Magnus the

GAP KING!!

GAP KING!!

Visionarys Gianna Andrews, Kory Kirby and I got the stir fry on in the dance floor & talked art/vans.

Visionarys Gianna Andrews, Kory Kirby and I got the stir fry on in the dance floor & talked art/vans.

Whether you realize something over and over or see it for the first time, life is made up of monumental moments. It shapes you. I consistently learn to go slower and let go. But this time I learned that comparing yourself is the opposite of belief. I've known this for a long time but I didn't just say it. I actually understood it. Closing the door to my outback after walking around the ferry, I melted into my seat. Thinking about the whole weekend. The car moved from the ferry waves and starting a 90's dance party in the most lit bar around PA, telling a kid he just killed a tree from ripping 2 cm of bark off of it, and laughing at yodeling walmart dude remixes bounced around in my head. I'm in disbelief. 

Scouting lines in April? Kim Lee

Scouting lines in April? Kim Lee

Disbelief that it can be this much fun. Thank you Rachel, Sam, Caleb, and everyone a part of these past two weeks. Praise

"I just realized I can sing Wonderwall in a Kermit voice" -lil r

Still Broken

Photographed by the amazing buttchuggamaroon

Photographed by the amazing buttchuggamaroon

Back to the og camera again, but this time I can't get enough film for it. I forgot how much fun it is. It's only been a few months since the ae-1 saw new a roll but I'm wishing I used it all Winter. The process of pressing the release until shutter gradually lets 36 photos come to life is one that I'll always love. You have to slow down to 1985 and think. It shows me how much I love making stuff. 

Porta 160

Porta 160

Sometimes its really cool how life forces you into a path you didn't see coming. But other times it really blows. Canon has called me back 3 times on the repair of my main camera and each time the estimate has gone up. It's now over the original price of the camera and I have $4 so I'll be using film for a minute. I can still rent for paid shoots but everything else is going to be a step back in time. The funniest/most frustrating part is, when my camera broke I received more emails asking to shoot in that day than in an entire month. Sick.. If there were bumps in the road I'd be catching air off of them. Which would actually be sick. 

Like Nicco

Like Nicco

I think event photography is where I've really finessed my abilities. You have to be on it. You have to run to a new spot and get your stuff dialed in .0023 seconds. It's mad fun!

KOTR, thanks to the Sauceposse, Line skis, and Mission Ridge parks. 

KOTR, thanks to the Sauceposse, Line skis, and Mission Ridge parks. 

Gabe Taube shleepin on your steps

Gabe Taube shleepin on your steps

1 over the high jump by Jake Salvador

1 over the high jump by Jake Salvador

KOTR was the only ski event in Washington you needed to be at. 

Will Wesson w a nose butter 1 that got a little wild

Will Wesson w a nose butter 1 that got a little wild

Sometimes you get ran into while shooting events, that's usually a sign you're in a good spot. 

Saga model babe Matt owen

Saga model babe Matt owen

This town is big enough for all of us

This town is big enough for all of us

This Winter has been one of the funnest I can remember, even though we didn't get every photo we talked about it was one I won't forget. 

chamoni mont blanc Rineere

chamoni mont blanc Rineere

Still trying to figure out what to do next. The camera isn't the only thing kinda weird, I'm still finding myself saying things I wish I could hit the rewind button on. In general just needing to let go and slow down more. No doubt I've overcome many mental hurdles and I'm more of the person I want to be, but I still have a way to go. We all do, but I think acknowledging an issue is a good step to overcoming it. I thought I'd be much further along in life by now, I thought the images from this Winter would be face melting, I thought my personality would outweigh mental shit, but that's not really the case. Like the people and world around me, I'm still broken. However even when things are broken you can still see some light. You can still have fun. 

Not to end on a heavy G minor note, just staying healthy, also really down to get out of rock bottom. I'll keep the blog going every 2 weeks.

I need another half an ahlmonde -Lil R

 

Dirt & Dreams, Summer 2017

The road to hipster world

The road to hipster world

Discouraged Adj. Having lost lost enthusiasm; disheartened. I could totally look back on the Summer and cry, because I have. It sucked, I've never been more exhausted or lonely in my life. I could look back on it and say, "Damn, I got let go because I'm terrible at my job. Or, "I barely connected with anyone, why can't I fit in". But that's not how it is. I got let go cause I am focused on something better (and cause of fucked scheduling). I didn't connect with everyone cause I didn't let go. Getting turned down from agencies & proposals, even dropping the ball on one of the hand full of jobs I did get was brutal. But out of all that, I chose not to be discouraged. Yeah I felt bummed, I still feel bummed rn, but I haven't lost all my enthusiasm. I have not given up. Careers take off, you just have to be patient.

This is going to be my last blog, I really got to let some nasty stuff out. This was good though

Solid 6.9/10 with the hat back

Solid 6.9/10 with the hat back

Dreams know the way. Found in the dust, no amount of untruth, loss or misunderstanding can separate me from you.

"ily" -Big R

Enough

tubing

tubing

Yo I struggle with feeling like I'm good enough. I kinda talked about how I'm already there but I'm still finding self worth. Looking for it in skiing, skating, photography, relationships, burritos, Idk where you find that shit but if I was some wise lion king monkey I'd say, "Within". Maybe I answered the Q?  

Splash mountain cam snagged this

Splash mountain cam snagged this

Another week of getting up early and going to bed late. Punching out emails and working my computer till she smoaks.  

Mach 6

Mach 6

Looking at this photo, I know I'm good enough. This was an awesome night filled with bears and tacobell. We set up lights perfectly and brought them to the right power within one test just based on how it felt. I waited half a second for the sound of the tire leaving the ground to sink in and then without even looking down my finder, pulled the trigger. The timing, the knowledge on both sides, and the team work made this photo happen in 2 tries. That's nuts. Part of that is experience and part of it is just believing that you can do it. The reality is you are good enough, for whatever comes your way.

Fall is pretty sweet

Fall is pretty sweet

I wont be ready for it all, but I'll be enough. 

"Ily, you deserve someone who's going to be there." -BigRed

 

T&C

My sister ft. Sapphire

My sister ft. Sapphire

Consistency is how I'd describe my ride from HS. It was a piece, (still is) but it got me everywhere, with room for everyone. She was consistently slow, and I was consistently stoked that Sapph's ran every day. This past week I thought a lot about what's next, I finally got my schedule figured out and nailed the consistency of my day to day. But to stay cohesive I need to continue my chaos. I think it's vital for my style of photos, the dream is to have work that's vastly different yet tied together. Traveling different places, hunting down elements that are fresh, alive and linked. No doubt I want to slow down at some point but skating/photos are too much fun rn. I think this crazy process is the one that makes me consistent in the future. 

Pr0-3.jpg

Driving into the sea of night when you look over and see this tear shedder. E-brake yanked. 

Frozen Pines

Frozen Pines

I got to stay in Wenatchee last weekend, hung with Lithic skis and my friend Simon.

Palmer above the world

Palmer above the world

Bob Ross at work

Bob Ross at work

This consistent chaos has prepped you for some of what's is next. Being cohesive comes from everything you do. Chugging on Just like Sapphire, get there. Slow, big, blue, and powered by a v6

"My voice doesn't work" -Big Red

Honesty

Anny-48.jpg

I fucking BLoww

Out of it

Hood on film this last week

Hood on film this last week

Getting out of it is easy to do. Like falling of the band wagon on the Oregon trail. This past week was my first with the new job driving a box truck and I realized how careless I was of my schedule. I just did whatever I wanted to, I worked for a few hours, skated, drew stuff, got a drink with a friend. I didn't even realize it but I was just waiting for some thing to happen. So out of it that work meant, 20 emails and a couple meetings. But this was the first week actually sticking to something and filling every minute. 

The Outback hotel

The Outback hotel

Yo this week was good though, got to ski hood a few times and let the hotel drift. It's always a good time skiing the September concrete. I found myself being able to shell out more time to have fun with a somewhat structured schedge. Moving things around and prioritizing. 

Gypsy isle was poppin. Paul going for a 2 out

Gypsy isle was poppin. Paul going for a 2 out

2nd round with Kasper

2nd round with Kasper

Back in PA for the "surprise" last race with Cascadia and the NW Cup. This has been the best Summer for me as far as growth goes. Hammering out photos and nailing down myself. I'm definitely a slooow learner and I couldn't be more stoked to suck less at being both a professional photographer and myself. After I finish this blog I'm going to run around, "always sunny dry hill" hanging with everyone and eating mud. 

hd-3.jpg

idk if I said it 8k times before but who fucking cares if you fall off the band wagon. No doubt you need to be consistent and full of drive if you want to make it. But if I didn't ditch the wagon I would not be who I am. Plus the Seahawks suck, who wants to be on that bandwagon?

Thank you everyone in my life right now, greatful for your words and time. 

"See you at city Hall" -Big Red (previous alias: Lil Ray, lil rach, butt chugga marooon)

Already There

Travis shifts

Travis shifts

I have really struggled with social constructs over the past few years, since I was like 17. So maybe like 5, but the idea that you have to think about the conversation while you're having one takes away every shred of authenticity you have. I felt so removed from every word and I wished I could relate, I just wanted to talk and not think. It happened just often enough to doubt my capabilities.  

What the heck Hood, you got snow already

What the heck Hood, you got snow already

However yesterday I realized it. I am who I want to be. All of the work, nights of throwing up, and painful conversations have preped me for the place I'm at. Part of the issue was dreaming up myself as a kid and not actually making myself. I would never get there if all the little things didn't matter. Yesterday I met with a director to talk about imagery and my mindset was, "I'm actually there." 

Car life in motel outback

Car life in motel outback

Pray for consistency, without it there is no greatness. 

Rodeo drive, with Travis

Rodeo drive, with Travis

Heavy and weird. Krusty and fun. 

"Don't tell Mom" -lil Ray